I want you to read this first bit of the review in your best Graham Chapman voice in your head. (If you don’t know who he is, ask your mum and dad!) This is because from pretty much the first note of Nanowar Of Steel’s set I wanted to say “Stop! This is very silly” because it was. From fluffed entrances (oo-er missus) to purple wigs, arabs and glittery jumpsuits that left nothing to the imagination the whole thing was totally silly, and that was what made it so good. The music is power metal with clever, subtle lyrics woven with unsubtle plain daft ones. It starts of a little pirate-y, with a yo-ho-ho and a pink tulle tutu. It passes by Cthulu, who appears to be phoning home, and teaches us to fly to Rome. With an owl. There’s a wall of love, which is like a wall of death but more huggy, and the crowd obediently parts. When the band say go there is no melee of a pit though, just a lot of embracing and a touch of ballet dancing. We learn how to do disco metal dancing, and we nod along to a bit of Norwegian Death Reggaeton. We hear about the Armpits of The Immortals, and that the smell will never die. There’s a song about Uranus (because this is the level we’re on tonight) and we all go to Valhallelujah in the end. At one point an Ikea side-table is built on stage and goes surfing over the heads of the crowds. Yep. It was all very silly, and I enjoyed it very much.

Nanowar Of Steel at the O2 Academy in Liverpool on April 25th 20

Tragedy come on to their signature song, a rocked-out cover of the Bee Gees classic, and I realise that one of the reasons I love watching them so much is their vocal harmonies. I’m a sucker for a decent harmony and with 4 different voices that meld together like honey this band is up there with the best. The other reason I like them so much is because they are more than just a musical gig, they are theatre. From the extravagant sequinned outfits to the overblown stage make-up to the pointlessness of stage hangaround and towel boy Lance, the whole thing is a crafted show. There is something for everyone here, even the grumpy husband is amused as he knows all the words! For that is Tragedy’s greatest strength, They take these songs that we all know so well, they deconstruct them and then rebuild them in their own inimitable style. Sometimes that’s a mash-up, as with ‘It’s Raining Men’ which contains the unmistakeable riff to ‘Reign in Blood’, sometimes it’s just a new but old sound altogether. I would give you the highlights of the set, but to be honest every single song was a highlight. “Fame!” we all scream, assuring the band that indeed we ARE all going to live forever. We head down to ‘Funky Town’ and it turns out to be a place of stompy power metal. By the power of magic the band morph into Neil King Diamond and we wave our arms aloft to ‘Sweet Caroline’. Toto’s ‘Africa’ has never sounded less like a power ballad, and the perkiness of Cyndi Lauper’s lesbian anthem ‘She Bop’ becomes a dark and sinister black metal romp instead. Throughout it all there is Lance, blowing bubbles, wearing masks, throwing our confetti and glitter and just generally getting in everybody’s way. The “‘K)Nights on Broadway’ are none more metal. We should be dancing to ‘You Should Be Dancing’, we know how Deep our Love is. Classics re-imagined, re-purposed and rocked out. The band actually used my words during the between-song banter tonight. Last time they came here I said that to really appreciate Tragedy you need to be smart enough to get it yet dumb enough to enjoy it. Still true. My voice is hoarse from singing along, and it was a joy to be part of the sex goddess energy when all the women in the room piled onto the stage for ‘YMCA’! A Tragedy show is music, good music, played well. But it’s also Entertainment with a capital E, and that’s why I love them. Well that and the sequins obviously!